SoZ Satire was formed from bits of plastic and some string during the long hot summer of 1888 in Whitechapel East London. In those days, our writers used to roam the streets wearing long cloaks and top hats, murdering and mutilating ladies of the night on an almost weekly basis.
However, we’ve calmed down a bit now and just write satire for the most part. Having said that, we do nip out for a relaxing bout of mutilating if it’s a bank holiday or The Queen’s birthday.
We’re all Londoners, we’re all partial to a glass or two of something warming, and hopefully we’re all quite funny.However, we’ll leave you to be the judge of that dear readers.
We have also recently been voted “The Erotica-Loving Taxi Driver’s Softcore Grumble Mag Of Choice” So check us out and see what all the fuss is about why doncha?
All the best from Team SoZ 🙂
Hello newest Spikey! I know, a bit corny, eh, but that’s the term that has come to stick for those folk who are part of the clan known to be followers of Uncle Spike 🙂
Thank you… I really appreciate that as I for one, know how many interesting and entertaining blogs are out there.
My aim is to deliver an eclectic offering of posts, from my ‘point n shoot’ attempts at basic photography, to the sharing of my travel adventures over the decades, as well as day to day happenings here on the farm. Oh, plus a few observations on life as I see it, thrown in for good measure.
My promise to you is not to be overbearing, just a couple of posts a day, maybe 3 at weekends if I have something special to share. But if you are at a loose end one day, maybe you’ll enjoy trawling through some of my older stuff too. I have added plenty of categories to help in said digging process.
Thanks again and hope you have a great day…
UNCLE SPIKE
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Thanks Uncle Spike. I’m an old dyed in the wool fan of your excellent, life-affirming blog. You may remember me in my former guise of Soz Satire. You don’t? Me neither! 😦
Looking forward to enjoying your gentle ruminations and excellent photography once more sir.
Kind Regards
Clive.
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I do indeed, welcome back 🙂
I did notice the name, of course, but as I wasn’t sure, I didn’t mention it, just in case…
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Mike, it’s hard to believe there are two more like you! I thought you were one of a kind. 😉 I will enjoy following you and your chaps along here as well. 😀
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I do apologise Rachel but I’m afraid Mike is unable to reply to your greeting as Shirley has him bound, gagged and chained helplessly to a wall in their Dungeon Of Wistful Sighs.
Therefore allow me to thank you for following our blog and for your extremely questionable judgement in so-doing.
Yours In Complete Freedom From Shackles
CD
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Thank you for following my blog, I have read your site and know that I am going to enjoy following you. Ann
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Cheers – great to see you over here on our soz satire collaboration. Yours, Mike Steeden!
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🙂
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🙂 Looking forward to new posts..I know I am going to love them
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You’ll probably love mine anyway NOW. The others will make you want to vomit into a bucket. I know they do me 😦
Thanks for the follow! 🙂
Clivey
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Well, I’m not a Londoner, but I think I know someone who lives in London, if that makes any difference. I thank you for deciding to follow my work, and perhaps it’s because you read The Pet Door, or: There Never Was a More Serious Matter.
Satire is the most important attire anyone can put on each day. Mine pokes at the US, which is probably unfair, as it is such fertile territory.
As we said in the 60s and 70s, write on!
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You know somebody in London?? If it’s Gary Hoadley can you tell him I want my wife back?…eventually. There’s no rush.
Clivey
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Wait — Gary’ s got MY wife, too!
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It’s almost like an illness with him I’m afraid my friend. I sent him to a counsellor but he stole his wife too 😦
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I don’t appreciate your penchant for raping and pillaging … you DO rape and pillage, do you not? Oh, I do hope so. Otherwise, who would fill the void as the object of my insatiable wrath?
By the by, thanks for following my occasionally humble blog.
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Due to European Union regulations we’ve had to restrict the pillaging to 1 hour every other Saturday. That was the best bit too! Bloody Europeans! Tsk 😦
Clivey
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Thanks for following me! Looking forward to reading your work!
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Thank you so much for the follow. I’m just sorry I didn’t find you all first. You are a hoot!! 🙂
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I’m sorry too Liz. We get 200 quid per follower from The Queen! 😉
Clivey
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Too funny. But, one question – who’s this Liz person?? 🙂
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I do beg your pardon Eileen. I’m afraid I’ve got a bad leg 😉
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I was so totally teasing you! It is no problem at all. 🙂
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Too late I’m afraid Eileen. I’ve already shot myself with my service revolver leaving behind 3 wives and 27 adoring children. I hope you’re satisfied now you heartless fiendetta! 😉
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I see my devious plan worked. Success! 🙂
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Ooooooh you can be so harsh and uncaring sometimes Eileen you really can, and there’s me not even cold in me grave!
Funeral’s next Friday btw. No sneakers, baseball caps or cops. 🙂
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Thanks so much for the follow. Hope it continues to give you an occasional chuckle.
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Cheers Patt I hope so too…otherwise I’ll be consulting my legal team…when they sober up 😦
Clivey
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Hi! Thanks for following me! And in true, stalker-like fashion, I’m now going to start following you. However, let’s keep the mutilation at a minimum. ‘Kay?
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No mutilation???? Awwwww you’re no fun Liz! 😦
Thanks for the follow 🙂
Clivey
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I know. It’s probably because I live in Kansas. Our state motto is, ‘Don’t Come To Kansas. We’re No Fun.’ (hee-hee)
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Looks like another fortnight in Harlem for myself and the wife and kids this summer then Liz 😦
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Yeah, never been to Harlem, but I HAVE been to Kansas. And I’ve got to agree. Harlem is the best choice for a vakay.
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This is fun!
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It sure is! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!
Thanks for the follow btw 😀
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Hello there. I just wanted to drop by and thank you for following my blog. I also wanted to wish you the best of luck in your future blogging.
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Thank you my friend, much appreciated.
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thanks for following my blog and turning me on to a piss poor excuse for humour – shall pass it on to all of my sick friends – unfortunately living in mexico a warm mug is out of the question but a good laugh is always welcome
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Muchas gracias John. Have a great day and don’t dive from any cliffs. No good will come of it trust me 😉
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Wow! This place is on fire! Totally deservedly so. Great bunch of satire/humorist and lovely men with it. I nearly wrote ‘gentle-men’ but caught myself! 😀
Which one of you do I see about payment?
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Mike. He’s so rich his entire crew of dustmen moved to Barbados after his last Xmas tip! 😉
Thanks Touch!
CD
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Thanks for following me at Triggershorse. – Fawn
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Thanks for stopping by and following my blog.. I just visited your blog here, Its just superb… I enjoyed reading all your posts… Looking forward to read more, as I’m your new follower now… 🙂
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Hey thanks Bela, that’s extremely kind, albeit very poorly judged of you 😀
I’m glad you enjoyed our output. It’s a bit like the Thames effluent pipe that flows into the sea at Tilbury Docks but not quite as funny.
Thank you for following us you crazy young fool! 😉
CD
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😀
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Not sure why you stopped by and followed my blog … not that I’m complaining … I deeply appreciate the follow. 😉
However, consider me a sheep (not that I am sheep, you know that, right?); I will be following the herd for future posts and stories. 🙂
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For God’s sake stop bleating! I bet you’re the type that will try and fleece us for money. You’re a dyed in the wool charlatan and I’m like a lamb to the slaughter!
Ok I’ll stop now. Thanks for the follow 🙂
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Okay, there’s no need to ram it home! 😉
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Shear genius! 😉
CD
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Many thanks for the follow! I hope you will return again soon and enjoy my blog! Big smiles. . . . .
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You’re welcome and thank you. Even bigger smiles 😀
CD
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Thanks for the follow. I love your about page–a lot of character and personality. Cheers.
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Cheers Brett. Character and personality you say? Mind if I quote you the next time the wife calls me nasty names? 😉
CD
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Thanks for dropping by my blog! Guys, you have the most hilarious blog going on here and the pics are awesome! 🙂 Cheers!
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Thanks GH. I can tell by your name that you’re one of the good guys. Glad you enjoyed our burgeoning rubbish 😉
CD
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Master Red appreciates your stopping by the blog and for following
It gave me a chance to discover your blog as well
Many thanks,
Nuttnhoney aka Master Red
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You’re welcome my friend. Can you lend me any money?
CD
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“I saw no one,” he said. “That is what you may expect to see when I follow you.” — Sherlock Holmes
Thanks for following me! High praise indeed from real live Londoners! — M.Vernet
amongyourbeesandyourbooks.wordpress.com
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You’re very welcome. Any aficionado of the great Baker Street sleuth is ok with me!
If I might just correct you on one small point? I’m a real live Londoner the other two are in a kind of barren hinterland twixt drunkeness and The Grim Reaper 🙂
CD
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I think I’ve been there. It’s North of Detroit, right?
M.Vernet
Greetings From Michigan, USA
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Thanks for the follow lads, it’s very encouraging.
Terry
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No worries Terence. It’s good to see you on the manor son 🙂
CD
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It seems like only yesterday that I was commenting to a fellow blogger about the bizarre folks who have begun following my blog. I’m not sure you reached the level of the necropheliac, but you seem way more interesting than the Restless Plumber.
Besides, I LOVE London. It was my first overseas trip — I’m ‘Merican and most of us don’t venture anyplace where they speak the, ummm, Queen’s English (with all those extra u s).
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The Queen’s English you say? You obviously haven’t listened in to myself and big Gary on the “dog and bone”. Are you familiar with the screen actor Ray Winstone? Well we sound a bit like him but without that air of refinement 😉
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I always wondered about good old Jack. Why those women and how come no one noticed the killings. Also why mutilate. The clues abound and yet never solved. I believe their was some who knew the truth but it was kept under covers.
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I always suspected it was my great grandfather you know. He owned a cloak, a butcher’s knife AND he used to travel around Whitechapel in a hansome cab. Mind you he was a Whitechapel butcher with a bad leg who used to feel the cold quite a lot 😦
CD
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If yo u are into gansgters – ex – cons and NYC street life you might enjoy this book of mine ! http://www.scribd.com/doc/218807150/Park-Avenue-to-Park-Bench
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I’ll have a word with Gaz mate. He’s a gangster, an ex-con and he’s been living in his street for 15 years 😉
CD
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Dear League of Mentals,
I high school classmate of mine, who I haven’t seen in 40 years, recently posted a picture of herself with a granddaughter on Facebook. I thought it would be funny if I posted “Who’s the fat lady with the hot chick?” So my former classmate de-friended me. I think there is a misunderstanding. What do you think I should do?
Your fan,
Robert
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All FB queries should be addressed to Mike mate. He’s got 897 friends, including George Dubya, Oprah Winfrey and a man that goes down the sewers wearing big rubber boots!
CD
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Thanks so much for the follow!
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Dont thank me Victoria! The others made me do it! 😀
CD
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Yay for the others! 😀
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I shall remember those harsh and condemnatory words the next time you ask for a short term loan Victoria! 😀
CD
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Excuse me, I think a hug is in order! 😀
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You’ve spent your monthly allowance on strong drink and gentlemen of easy virtue again haven’t you Victoria?
Ok I can let you have a tenner but I’ll be charging interest mind! Tsk 😦
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Yes, it appears I have. How did you know that…LOL
Interest it is. In what form or fashion might I ask? -;)
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What form of fashion Victoria? Well a half decent tuxedo for Gaz and a pair of pants with no holes in the arse for Mike would be a start. For myself, my sartorial excellence is beyond reproach and needs no further action. *lights pipe and smooths down creases in little black dress*
CD
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Ok, I’ll get crackin on that right away! Now I’m off to find my red dress and heels.
Party on!
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Thanks for following WordBowlbyMsCharlieS.com and introducing me to your wicked wit. I look forward to seeing what you get up to next (from a safe distance, of course)…
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You’re very welcome and you’re also very wise. Might I suggest you observe us in future from somewhere none of us are ever likely to venture, such as Neptune or South London? 🙂
CD
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I wish I was a Londoner, so then I could join your fine league! 🙂
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Steady on Sparky! I wouldn’t wish “Londonism” on my own worst enemy! Don’t you realise we do all our washing in a launderette and end each day coated in a fine film of soot? Please reconsider I beg of you! 😦
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Hey, nobody is as hot as Dick van Dyke was in Mary poppins covered in soot….
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He’d have been even hotter if I’d had my way Sparky. I’d have had the boy burned at the stake for THAT Cockney accent!
“Oh it’s a jolly ‘oliday wiv Mayweeeee”
Why I outta! 😦
CD
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Well, we Americans are pretty clueless sometimes…
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and anyway, I like to get a little dirty. 😉
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You’d love my old woman then Sparky. She works down the London sewers with big rubber boots on. We’re not very happily married but our crop of rhubarb each year is second to none!
CD
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I hear you blokes are having a bit of trouble following my blog. I was able to follow yours, so let’s see what is going on. I’m going to post a link to one of my posts right here:http://variouspontifications.com/2014/04/22/vintage-photos-of-people-from-the-bible/ Let me know if it opens when clicked on.
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Mission accomplished my friend. Great to have you on board, as the actress said to the bishop 🙂
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Ya had me at ‘mental’ and ‘plastic’.
“All aboard!”
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Ullo sailor! Pieces of eight and all that frightful, nautical nonsense old boy. Welcome aboard! 🙂
CD
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Glad you’ve joined my crew of followers, I can always use more scurvey lads! Arrrr…
Really, you’re funny, even if I only get about half of what you’re talking about. I guess I just don’t know enough about British stuff to understand it all. I was only in London once a looong time ago. 😉
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ARRRRRRRRR Jill lad! Avast behind!!!
But that’s enough about my wife. Thanks for the follow 🙂
CD
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Interesting…thanks for following my blog. I will follow yours as well. beebeesworld
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Hilarious! You guys are great. Thanks for following my blog. 😉
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Thank you kindly HB. Did you know they named a type of pencil after you btw? 😉
CD
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They did? That’s cool…lol.
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Hello there.
I got nominated for Liebster and would like to nominate you as well.
The link is as below. Do feel free to participate if you like 🙂
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I say! That’s jolly decent of you old chap! Do we have to “do” anything? If so I’ll get the others on it straight away!
If there’s a cash prize could you ensure it’s sent to me so that I can look after it properly? Thanks 🙂
CD
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The mission sir is open to you. You may assemble the team as you wish!
I’ll talk to the accountant about the prize delivery. You know how Old Maggie is with the books. 😉
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Indeed I do my good friend! Now while I’m far too lazy to answer and pose all the necessary questions, I reckon there’s a more than decent chance that old Mike or even older Gaz will be up for this one. In the meantime thank you for your kindness in putting our ropey old blog up for the award. I’ve read your blog and you are indeed one of the good guys 🙂
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Mentals, thanks for following me on Cold. If you love satire, try http://www.cocoh.net
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I tried it and immediately gained 2 stone in weight. Where’s the fairness in that then? 😦
CD
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Thank you for the follow! Pretty funny post here.
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Yes that’ll be Mike but the least said about his funny post the better I’m afraid. He gets quite touchy about it on occasion 😦
CD
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thanks for the follow..your blog is hilarious..lilly
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Only when I write the skits Lilly. The rest of the time it stinks the place out trust me. 🙂
Clivey
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i understand..dt thinks hes quite witty.
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Looks like fun over here at your site.
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Looks can be very deceiving I’m afraid mate. It’s hell. Sheer unadulterated hell! In fact if it wasn’t for the incredible salary and generous fringe benefits I’d have hung myself years ago 😦
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Well – you continue to hang in there for the benefit of the rest of us. 🙄
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So because unicorns are real and Pillsbury is secretly hoarding the world’s largest supply of jelly beans… Sorry, I got distracted. Anyway, I nominated your blog for an award. Disregard the “lovely” bit if you like, I just think your articles are highly amusing.
Read about it (or don’t) here: http://wp.me/p4LWS6-39
Good day.
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An award you say? Great stuff love! I’ll get the others on it right away!!
Clivey
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Sorry, I was just looking for the toilet and I must have taken a wrong turn somewhere and entered this site rather than http://www.poshlavatories.com. I couldn’t use yours could I? Oh, and you’d better give it five minutes afterwards… curry last night you see.
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Who hunts dogs and why and what type of dog am I allowed to be and can I choose, seeing that I should be allowed a last wish and such. Now that I’ve got that off my chest: I enjoy the name of your blog. I know some bra-burning person will feel upset by the ‘benevolent sexism’ of it all – not noticing what it implies, only that it has the ‘M’ word in it. I will get around to its contents in a second. Hi Mike Steeden! Yous get around, dun yous?(I’m still being taught English by a friend)
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Taught English by a fiend eh? Couldn’t you have found a nice, friendly person to give you tuition? I’m afraid Mike can’t answer this as he’s learning Mandarin Chinese at Sussex University so that he can exchange heartening, supportive comments with a Beijing blogger he’s started following. Thanks for the follow btw. You won’t regret it…in all probablity.
CD
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All lies! Mike was buying fags in Belgium today, I’ll have you know
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“Buying fags” ??? Now look here, I’m sorry but we dont permit crude American pejoratives at The League Of Mental Men. Here, we like to refer to them as ‘gentlemen of the gay persuasion’ And in any case, what Steeden does with the pocket money his old woman gives him is surely his own affair! Outrageous! 😦
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Really? ‘Them’? Do you still put labels on people? I will refer you to Sir John Lennon and hope you join the dreamers among us… This must be the worst insult I have received all year! I’ll have you know I do not, and never will, speak ‘American’ as it is not a language but a dialect and I do not care who feels offended by this statement. There is only one dictionary for the English language and that is the OED. The rest should be burnt. And if Sir Steeden wishes to buy a ball of seasoned chopped liver, it is indeed his business, but then I would have said ‘faggot’. I am specific. I used slang because typing out the word ‘cigarettes’ when the bladder is at its very brim, can create so much of an inconvenience. ‘Old woman’! Why not say ‘wench’ and get it done with? But I will leave Shirley to defend herself as she is more than capable, for sure. Outrageous indeed!
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Hello! This is Amreen Shaikh from Paint The World With Words & thank you for the follow!
You’ve an amazing blog and wonderful posts!
I wished to contact you, but did not find a suitable contact ID, so could you please drop in your email ID on painttheworldwithwords@gmail.com
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Hello Amreen. Thank you for your kind appraisal of the blog. Sadly, I can’t give you my contact details because I’m wanted by Scotland Yard, The FBI, and the Australian Secret Service. You could be an agent for one of these organisations seeking my whereabouts, my arrest and subsequent imprisonment. I’m really sorry about that.
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Hey! It is completely OK! But I’m not from any such agencies. You’re following me, so I commented you and that too, publicly on your blog! 🙂
Anyway, have a nice day!
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Please don’t be offended Amreen, it’s just that a wanted felon on the run like me can’t be too careful. The last time I gave out my email, I was beaten up quite badly and left for dead…and that was by my mum! 😦
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Its alright! Its completely fine! 🙂
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