A team of scientists at Swansea University have discovered an ‘irrefutable’ link between being run over by a steamroller, with spikes fitted to the roller, and the little understood ‘Sudden Death Syndrome’, which can strike both adults and newly born infants alike.
Professor Toby Dell, the head of scientific research at the university, revealed: “During our research into so-called Sudden Death Syndrome, we placed a number of people of all ages, ranging from 6 month-old babies to people in the 80 plus age bracket, in the path of a spiked steamroller. Without exception all of them died suddenly, and in most cases almost instantaneously. We must, therefore, conclude that this is irrefutable proof that being run over by a spiked steamroller is injurious to health and should be avoided where possible”.
This latest revelation comes just two weeks after nutritionists revealed that eating in excess of 6lbs of beef dripping a day helps prevent bowel cancer and makes your hair curly.