BEING RUN OVER BY A SPIKED STEAMROLLER INJURIOUS TO HEALTH SAY EXPERTS

steamroller

A team of scientists at Swansea University have discovered an ‘irrefutable’ link between being run over by a steamroller, with spikes fitted to the roller, and the little understood ‘Sudden Death Syndrome’,  which can strike both adults and newly born infants alike.

Professor Toby Dell, the head of scientific research at the university, revealed: “During our research into so-called Sudden Death Syndrome, we placed a number of people of all ages, ranging from 6 month-old babies to people in the 80 plus age bracket, in the path of a spiked steamroller. Without exception all of them died suddenly, and in most cases almost instantaneously. We must, therefore, conclude that this is irrefutable proof that being run over by a spiked steamroller is injurious to health and should be avoided where possible”.

This latest revelation comes just two weeks after nutritionists revealed that eating in excess of 6lbs of beef dripping a day helps prevent bowel cancer and makes your hair curly.

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11 Comments

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11 responses to “BEING RUN OVER BY A SPIKED STEAMROLLER INJURIOUS TO HEALTH SAY EXPERTS

  1. garyhoadley

    So that is how my Nan turned her toes up…

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hehehe made me laugh this one. I really worry about the way your mind works. I’m not sure if you’re a genius or completely barmy.

    Talking of uni, my son is studying Aerospace Engineering at Uni, in the UK. (Thankfully we managed to talk him out of joining the air force…Phew). When he calls looking for help, we take great pleasure in saying “it’s not like it’s rockets science boy.” I can imagine him rolling his eyes and thinking ‘not again.’

    Small pleasures.

    Liked by 3 people

  3. Nude pics you say? I’m sure I can arrange for those for you, I’ll ask my son or hubby how they’re fixed. I thought you might have a penchant for rockets 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Ok, forget the nude pics. Just send a postal order for five pounds and we’ll say no more about the whole sorry business 😦

    Liked by 1 person

PLEASE BE GENTLE. WE SATIRISTS CAN DISH IT OUT BUT WE CAN'T TAKE IT.

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