Youthful Satirical Magazine Editor Reprimands Elderly Writer For Being “Wholly Unpleasant” To Readership

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The boots Steeden wore to kick a defenceless child up the arse pictured last night

 

A writer for a humorous online publication has been hauled over the coals by the editor-in-chief for being wholly objectionable to its readership, and has been issued with a written warning as to his future conduct.

Mike Steeden, 128, from Africa, stands accused of losing the magazine thousands of loyal readers due to his constant, derogatory and foul-mouthed outbursts, directed mainly at readers from the WordPress online blogging site.

The editor of the Soz Satire magazine, Clivey Dee, alleges that Steeden has been a “disruptive influence” and a “complete fucker right from the word go”

Dee spoke to us from his office in Whitechapel, East London last night  “Steeden has been a disruptive influence and a complete fucker right from the word go and I’m not prepared to put up with it. I’ve spent months accumulating a loyal readership from WordPress, often working late into the night, being extremely pleasant and complimenting people on their blog posts even though I’ve never actually read any. I’ve lost count of the times I’ve woken up slumped over my keyboard in the early hours after being overcome by fatigue while making an irritating, time-consuming comment, and then Steeden comes along and undoes all my good work by calling people “dozy arseoles, fuckers and smelly old fat bums” Well it’s going to stop and if there’s any repetition of his deeply unpleasant and uncalled for behaviour, he’ll find himself in the dole queue as lively as you like”

Steeden himself was unavailable for comment last night as he’s in police custody for allegedly booting a 5 year old boy repeatedly up the arse, but his wife of 11 years, Shirley, 12, of no fixed abode told us “Yes it’s true. He’s a complete and utter turd and hanging’s far too good for him in my view”

We tried to get a word from one of the other staff writers, Mr Gerald “Inchcock” Chambers, yesterday morning but his landlady said he was “having an early night”

Steeden, a former chairman of The Young Conservatives and a staunch supporter of the far right British National Party, is due to preside over a neo-nazi rally in Cheltenham later this afternoon, where he will be giving a talk on how best to keep the wogs in their places before ritually burning an effigy of former socialist stalwart and Leader Of The Opposition, Michael Foot.

If you’d like to see Steeden being a complete fucker somewhere other than here, why not check out this magazine:

http://sozsatire.wix.com/soz-satire

Don’t blame me if you calls you a “bloody bastarding bastard” and tries to recruit you into a far right political party though!!!

Clivey

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18 Comments

Filed under Humor, Humour

18 responses to “Youthful Satirical Magazine Editor Reprimands Elderly Writer For Being “Wholly Unpleasant” To Readership

  1. I’m truly chuffed about this – I’ve been satirized after all these years. A dream come true. I shall dine out on this – well I would do if I hadn’t hospitalized the entire family and alienated my friends in UKIP calling them girlie lefties and that. I can at last proudly support Millwall FC and eat German sausages.

    Liked by 1 person

    • It’s about time too as you say Sir Steeden. Never in the field of satirical gesticulations within the bounds of limitless access to tomfoolery has a need been more satisfied, gratified and worthy than this accolade to one of Britain’s finest sacricolist’s adored and respected by all who don’t know him. Constipations Mike… no no sorry… Congratulations Mike!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. “GREAT TITS”! I’m outta here!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. The actions of Mr. Steeden have served to open up a wider question; namely – do defenceless children actually deserve a good kick up the arse?

    Please send you replies on a postcard to:-

    The Rt. Dead. Cyril Smith MP
    c/o Bryn Alyn Children’s Home
    Wrexham

    Liked by 1 person

    • I fail to see how you can make light of this one to be honest mate. We’re dealing with a true fucker here! You know that Marissa who goes round commenting on everyone’s blog? Well Steeden called her a “fucking bastard” and accused her of having a “fat ass” and to “cut down on the Tootsie Rolls love”
      The man’s clearly a loose cannon and the sooner the likes of me and you, and the rest of our beloved WordPress Family join forces to rid the place of his odious presence, the better if truth be told.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Worse part about Steeden is his insistence on speaking Spanish whenever I ask him to pay up on all the loans I’ve given him over the years to run his damn blog. “No habla Ingles,” just doesn’t fuckin’ cut it anymore mate! You owe me $2.00 friggin’ bucks! Pay up, or …..Wait a minute…We are talking about Hector Steeden of Mexico City here, right?

        Liked by 2 people

      • If only we were mate. We’re dealing with somebody who makes “Honest” Hector look like Santa Bernadette of Lourdes.
        I call upon you and all other members of our beloved WordPress Family to ostracise and shun this vile creature and to take up the cudgel against his utter bastardishness and his one-man character assassination of that Marissa!!! *lights pipe and snatches up pitchfork* BURN THE MONSTER!

        Liked by 1 person

      • $Amen$ So it has been written, so too shall it be obeyed! $Amen$ $Amen$ $Amen$

        Like

  4. Oh that Mike Steeden, he is a bad seed, you know. I very nearly stopped following the site completely after he started putting comments on my blogs I’d rather not even repeat in this comment. I think he may be on some weird meds though, because lately he’s just been writing ‘Far out!’

    Like

PLEASE BE GENTLE. WE SATIRISTS CAN DISH IT OUT BUT WE CAN'T TAKE IT.

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