Clivey & Gaz in: Missing!

Written using a ratio of 12 to 1 by Gary Hoadley

Edited using a rather nice blue pencil by Clivey Dee

 

“Ullo Gaz”
“Ullo Clivey”
“What do ya know, what do ya say Gaz?”

“I’m worried mate”.

“Worried?”
“Yes mate, worried”.
“What about mate? What is this thing that has you worried?”
“This musician that’s gone missing”.
“Which one mate. To which musician are you referring mate??”
“You know, he was in the paper”.
“The Sun?”
“No”.
“The Mirror?”
“Nah”.
“What paper then Gaz? What paper was he in mate?”
“The Telegraph”.
“Telegraph? Since when did you read the Telegraph?”
“Since yesterday Clivey”.
“Where Gaz? Where was it that you read The Daily Telegraph mate?”
“In the loft of that old house I’ve been working on”.
“The loft?”
“Yeah, I was fixing the water tank”.
“Oh, right,”
“I was having a spot of nosebag when I see a copy of The Telegraph on the deck, so I thought…”
“Did you have a butchers at it Gaz?”
“I’ll say I did son! I had a butchers at it, and on the front page was a story about this musician that’s gone missing”.
“What was his name then?”
“Glenn Miller”.
“Glenn Miller?!”
“Yeah, Have you heard of him Clivey?”
“I have as it happens mate…Hold on!  How old was this newspaper?”
“No idea mate”.
“Didn’t you look at the date?”
“I couldn’t Clive”.
“Why Gaz? What was it that prevented you from looking at the date on the front page of The Telegraph mate?”
“I’d got taken short a bit earlier and wiped me bottle and glass on it on it”.
“Shame”.
“Yeah shame”.

The above skit was brought to you courtesy of The Clive And Gary Home For Distressed Quantum Physicists.