Sicko Fant: The Sexually Insane, Wildly OTT, Fawning WordPress Follower You Can Trust

perv

“I’m loving your work!”

 

Dear Sicko

I wrote a piece of satire last night that should have appeared on your Reader by now and I’d really value your opinion on its quality, as I know I can rely on you to be disarmingly truthful and wonderfully insightful in your judgement.

Thanks Sicko

Bob’sBogStandardBlog.wordpress.com

******************************************************

Dear Bob

I did indeed see it and to be perfectly honest I thought it was absolutely magnificent and by some distance quite simply the greatest thing I have ever read!

It had the lot! It was hilarious, thought-provoking, deeply moving and chock full of some of the most wonderfully descriptive writing it has ever been my privilege to read!

In my opinion it’s a shoo-in to be made Freshly Pressed Blog Post Of The Decade, and if it isn’t, then there’s just no justice in this world in my opinion. Even the spelling, syntax and usage of the possessive apostrophe took my breath away. Absolutely inspiring!!

PS. I want to dress you up as a giant baby and put various pieces of fruit up your bottom.

All the very best

Sicko

So if you’ve recently written a load of risible old toot, that quite frankly stinks like a rancid turd, why not give Sicko a call? He’ll happily massage your fragile ego, and anything else he can get his mucky paws on to be honest with you.

Clivey

 

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11 Comments

Filed under Satire

11 responses to “Sicko Fant: The Sexually Insane, Wildly OTT, Fawning WordPress Follower You Can Trust

  1. sozsatire

    Let the awkward shuffling about and inner soul-searching commence! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Note to self: Never eat fruit salad at Clive’s house.

    Like

  3. alienorajt

    Laugh out loud moment there, chaps! Jolly good show!

    Like

    • sozsatire

      To be honest I’m amazed at the amount of bloggers who have given this rather libellous little piss take of the mutual back-slappers who seem to have the spare time and rather odd (to me) inclination to trundle through countless blogs handing out the fawning platitudes irrespective of the content they encounter. Although maybe I’m doing em a disservice and they genuinely do think everything they read is utterly brill and it’s not just a ploy to get shedloads of love and kisses on their own, rather ordinary, output. So fair play to all who have liked and commented on this, albeit through gritted teeth hehehe. 😀

      Like

      • alienorajt

        It’s a bloody weird world we live in, right enough! And dear old Sicko Fant is as active in the blogging community as he was in the teaching one. My God, I met some prize arse lickers in the latter profession – and I have to confess now that the reason I never got anywhere on the promotion front was precisely because I spoke my mind and refused to grovel, fawn or praise the insipid wankers, casting couch fast trackers and other bottom feeders who figure so prominently in most Leadership Teams. Probably explains why I ain’t exactly prize-winning viral material on here as well!

        Like

      • leagueofmentalmen

        Damn! I was just going to nominate your blog for one of those lame awards which seem to be wholly aimed at prying into every fucker’s business under the auspices of making you believe your blog is “totally awesome” 😀

        I once witnessed a female blogger enter into the throes of what appeared to be orgasmic joy on the grounds that one of her deeply tedious, turgid tales had been “Freshly Pressed”

        What? Like a pair of trousers?

        Fuck’s sake!

        Like

      • alienorajt

        Thank you for cheering me up with this splendidly scathing bit of irreverence! Ye gods, the pair of trousers bit just about sums up the whole crass fucking inbredness of Freshly Pressed.
        Love the second paragraph, and can well imagine the moans and gasps of the aforesaid deeply sad individual!
        Jeez, I’ve only been on here for eleven months and I am disillusioned already! Saves time, I suppose!
        Awards would mean something if one didn’t have to share them like the common cold (or Herpes, for the more adventurous) with every other bugger who ain’t completely illiterate.
        As for the prompts, challenges and feckin’ Speakeasy ‘Vote for a friend/judge’ wank-fest, don’t get me started!
        Anyway, good to find a kindred spirit on here.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Sounds awesome. Digging through the archives for the perfect piece!

    Like

    • leagueofmentalmen

      I salute you for replying. I wrote a similarly caustic piece, lampooning the duplicitous and faintly ridiculous, WordPress community, on my Soz Satire blog a few months back, only to be met with a silence so deafening you could hear a fawning platitude drop hehehe
      A beautiful girl smiled and told me the other day “You’re not really cut out for this social networking stuff are you Clivey?”
      Her beauty was matched only by her perception and observational skills 😀

      Like

PLEASE BE GENTLE. WE SATIRISTS CAN DISH IT OUT BUT WE CAN'T TAKE IT.

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