Michael Schumacher’s Stolen Medical Files Found Blocking Fernando Alonso’s Driveway

alonso

Alonso pictured last night after getting a lift to the off-licence from a neighbour


Boxes containing the stolen medical records of stricken Formula One legend, Michael Schumacher, have been discovered strewn across the driveway of his erstwhile Spanish rival, Fernando Alonso, in a bizarre reminder of the infamous Monaco Grand Prix incident in 2006 when the German ace, now in an induced coma following a skiing accident last year, deliberately stalled his engine and then ‘parked’ his Ferrari at the Rascasse bend during qualifying in order to prevent the Spaniard, his closest rival for the championship at the time, from completing his last flying lap and possibly pipping him for pole position on the grid.

Alonso, who discovered the boxes as he tried to get his Ford Fiesta out of the garage to go to his local off-licence, last night told reporters. “Let’s just say the irony of this one wasn’t totally lost on me”

A spokesman for the sport’s governing body, FIA, said last that no decision had yet been made as to any punishment but that they were considering issuing Schumacher with a drive through penalty or even handing him a points deduction.

Clivey

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4 Comments

Filed under Satire

4 responses to “Michael Schumacher’s Stolen Medical Files Found Blocking Fernando Alonso’s Driveway

  1. sozsatire

    You’ll get some stick for this one Clivey boy. I’m just glad I’m not in your shoes son hehehe.
    Oh ‘ang on though! 😦

    Like

  2. brilliant – love it!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. sozsatire

    Just so as you won’t think this is a spurious skit, Schumi’s records actually have been stolen and are purported to be available to the highest bidder. There’s some real charmers in this world of ours and no error.

    Like

PLEASE BE GENTLE. WE SATIRISTS CAN DISH IT OUT BUT WE CAN'T TAKE IT.

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